1. Respect. Respect is the aspect of every single relationship *romantic or not* that makes things work. Without respect, a relationship cannot last. Although this should be a non-negotiable for everyone, it can be a hard thing to admit to yourself.
You may be in a comfortable relationship, but often times respect is lost and both people just don’t see it. If your partner puts you down, overlooks your feelings or opinions, or is even rude, it is time to decide if your relationship can be fixed or if you should move on.
2. Commitment. Sure, some relationships are open and they work. But, if you are someone who thrives on monogamy and something you cannot and do not want to waiver on, it is non-negotiable.
If your partner cannot commit to you the way you need to be committed to in order to feel fulfilled within your relationship, it may be time to say goodbye.
3. Passion. Some people may find passion overrated. Sure, it is something that comes and goes throughout the years, but if passion is what you or your partner needs in a relationship and the other is not willing to reignite that spark, how do you work through that?
You can communicate your feelings all you want, but when both partners cannot agree on how the relationship works and what you’re are passionate about, you hit a brick wall. You have to decide if that non-negotiable is worth it.
4. Family. Whether it be your parents, grandparents, or potential children, our families are huge parts of our lives. If your partner doesn’t get along with your family or you don’t get along with theirs, you can hold your tongue a couple holidays a year, but if it is more than some tension on the holidays, can you keep up the politeness?
If you want children and your partner doesn’t, will you wait for them to change their mind when you know you won’t? Is the relationship worth it when you can’t get what you want? Family is not the same as choosing where to order food from or where to go on vacation. Is that something you can change your mind about?
5. Finances. Sadly, money is a big part of serious relationships. Do you agree on how to spend and how to save? Can your partner deal with you making more than them? Can they deal with you picking a job for fulfillment over money?
It is a shame that money plays such a large role in our lives, but it is an undeniable fact and money problems end a lot of relationships. Sharing your monetary non-negotiables regularly can keep you both happy, but if you can’t agree, you have a choice to make.
6. Future. Plans do not always work out as we hoped. But having a general idea of your future helps you move forward. You do not need to plan out your whole life, but sharing dreams and goals with your partner can be vital to your future together.
If what you want is to travel the world and your partner wants to settle down, discuss how that will work for you two. If you can’t come to an agreement that is a non-negotiable for you.
7. Ignorance. One big relationship killer is ignorance. In a relationship, you always should be willing to learn from each other and be open to one another’s positions and opinions. Being with someone rigid on change and close-minded can lead to endless arguments.